I Just Want to Know…

Is it just me or does anyone else have issues with multiple stall bathrooms?

(ALERT: If you’re finicky and believe that women do not make use of the facilities, or should not speak about usage of same in public, please click that nice little red X on the upper right corner of your screen–now.)

Okay, now for the rest of you for-real folk:

I am, and have been for some years, an irregular defecator. However, since moving from New York to PA, it has gotten even worse; so much so that I even remembered to mention it to my doctor at my last visit.

Her opinion, “It might just be the water here in the valley.” (Lehigh Valley, that is, home to some of the nastiest tasting water you ever wanna sample.)

Anyway, back to the multiple stalls issue. Maybe, I spoke up too soon, or started drinking too much water and just jinxed myself? Because in the last two months, I have been quite prolific in my bowel movements. Yay! Almost regular. Downside? It’s always at work! I have tried holding it till off hours, you know…before 12 noon and after 2:30 pm, but 3 out of 5 times, just as I am mid-movement, so to speak, what do I hear? Footsteps!

Oh nooooo. Please not the stall next to me, please, please, please? Too late, here she/they come(s)! Should I hold my breath? Pull my feet up? But somehow, I know that even if I do one or the other, or even both, she/they’ll still know I’m here. (No, not via green fumes escaping under the door, I am the only African American person in my building…but that’s another story) So I grit my teeth, hold my breath and do everything but click my red heels, as I try to stop the action of my bowels…not possible. So once again I am defeated by the timing of my bodily function.

After that last embarrassing episode, I thought about it and I figure there ought to be some rules to avoid such embarrassment and they’d go like this:

• The first person in should use the very first stall so that their feet will be visible, thereby cluing in the next person to skip a stall (which is the next rule)
• People please skip a stall, there’s no need for all that bonding if there are three other free stalls.
• All sound effects should be kept to a minimum (see next bullet)
• Before usage, place a goodly amount of toilet tissue in the toilet bowl, thereby avoiding that plop…without the fizz sound effect. (Newly discovered tip from my sister.) 

  (DISCLAIMER: Now if y’all can’t tell the difference between goodly and too much and your bathroom clogs up…my name is Bess and I ain’t in this mess!)

• Wipe that sprinkle after you tinkle

• Have air freshener will travel

• Hand washing is mandatory!

That’s my little curiosity (read: sharing and caring) moment for today.

Peace, Dee

P.S. As I concluded this piece, another curiousity moment came to me…when Pastor says that we should always be ready to share a testimony…I wonder if that includes moments like this?

 

Adversity: There is a Silver Lining

I don’t quite see dead people as yet…but a few more months of this and I’ll be one of them!”

Adversity is defined as a state or condition contrary to one of well-being or an instance of misfortune. Well…that sounds about right. I just seem to have used up my quota– and that of a few friends and family members as well.

The scripture states “All things work together for good for they who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose.” Until recently I had issues with that scripture because it just didn’t make sense to me. My thoughts ran the gamut of, I’m almost homeless and that has a purpose? I don’t quite see dead people as yet, but gimmie a few more months of this and I’ll be one of them…this has a purpose? My fiance is about to become a father, and I’m not pregnant, umm…still searching for the purpose.

Sometimes it may be that we’re not in the right location, and we know it but we’re reluctant to move. So God allows the circumstance that causes us to move to where we’re supposed to be.

Sometimes, we may need to be cut off from all our tasks, duties, jobs, entertainment, so that we can spend time by ourselves and hear the voice of God.

Sometimes we may take credit for the gifts of God, so God allows the downsizing, the voice loss, the carpel tunnel, and so forth so that we may realize, that we of ourselves can do nothing with out Him.

But before we can find the silver lining in our adversity, we need to give into it. Give into it? Yes. Sometimes we’re so busy striving against the adversity we don’t pause to examine the purpose. Oops, I said the “P” word didn’t I?

Ah well, it can’t be avoided. Pausing the struggle takes our eyes off of the circumstance long enough so that we can see the underlying message. After coming out of two years of poverty and depression, I can now say that I truly understand that adversity is a tool that shows us exactly who we are so that the necessary process that leads to refinement can continue. So, no He doesn’t want or will bad to or for you or me, but when He allows it, I’ve learned three things:

• He doesn’t allow more than I can bear, so I take comfort in the knowledge that my God has confidence in me!
• Even when it breaks me down till I’m weakened and torn. I take courage in the knowledge that at my weakest His strength I’ll secure.
• Even when it seems to go on and on. I remind myself that although He never seems to come when I think He should, He always manages to be right on time!

 

Issues: Life’s Equalizer

“Manageable unresolved teenage issues become potentially explosive adult issues.”

Around age 14, I remember battling with thoughts of suicide. As a recent transplant from the Island of Trinidad & Tobago in the West Indies; I combated homesickness, family dysfunction, social dysfunction and the onset of bi-polar disorder (a/k/a manic depression).

Being a product of the West Indies, hard work was expected, dysfunctional family situations accepted, superstition prevalent and mental illness overlooked or attributed to witchcraft. Add to that the strong-black-woman mentality, habitual silence, the Christianity quandary and the result was a conflicted, suicidal teenager.

In retrospect I realize that everyone has issues…some folk take them in stride, others allow their issues to become a crippling force in their lives and others deny their existence.

I have tried all of the above at some point in my life. And come to the realization that they won’t go away unless I face them, learn about them and seek help and/or assistance for what is above my capability to assist or handle by myself.

If you feel as though you’re going down for the third time without a lifeboat in sight, I’ve provided a short list of hotlines and websites so that you may either find the support you need or the information you need.

No need to go it alone, reach out, click and latch onto what’s yours for the taking.

Peace,
Dee